January 2011
I've been sleep deprived for the past few days due to the fact that my baby bear Brady has been sick. I need to sleep, I love to sleep, I miss sleep. I spent most of the day today in a zombie like state and had an appointment to workout at 4pm with my life skills instructor. You may be asking yourself wtf is a life skills instructor and why do I have one? Well some douche abused me when I was a kid, I have the "fat suit" for protection. I confronted him about 2 years ago now. I am totally feeling better now on the inside, so I need my outsides to reflect that. I still have my ups and downs hence the life skills instructor. So she "makes" me work out and get out more, doing the things I enjoy instead of living life like a hermit.
I've been sleep deprived for the past few days due to the fact that my baby bear Brady has been sick. I need to sleep, I love to sleep, I miss sleep. I spent most of the day today in a zombie like state and had an appointment to workout at 4pm with my life skills instructor. You may be asking yourself wtf is a life skills instructor and why do I have one? Well some douche abused me when I was a kid, I have the "fat suit" for protection. I confronted him about 2 years ago now. I am totally feeling better now on the inside, so I need my outsides to reflect that. I still have my ups and downs hence the life skills instructor. So she "makes" me work out and get out more, doing the things I enjoy instead of living life like a hermit.
Kaitlyn is my LS instructor, she is away this week, so I am working with her student. She is totally cute, just a wee little thing, we met at the office first because I haven't met her yet. Oh how I was hoping that she was going to let me skip today's workout because I felt like craptastic because I hadn't slept in 2 day and, I had an abscess on my thigh that felt like the grand canyon. I thought that being an adult I'd grow out of the acne faze of my life, guess not. Having the PCOS is totally not awesome, weight gain, acne, and I'm like a gorilla underneath my clothes too btw, thanks PCOS! I love having you!
Sorry off topic again. So we head to the gym, I go to a quaint hole in the wall little place, A. because it's quiet, 2. because I hate feeling like everyone is watching me and C. because it's small. I usually go during the morning and my appointment was for 5pm, it's fricken busy, full of gym boys. I hate the gym boys that's why I go when they are in school or when they are busy doing their paper route. I am too chubby and too old to impress high school boys. We are on the treadmill, I am soooooo not into it. I am so GD tired could have fallen asleep at any moment and done one of those face plant fall & slide off the treadmill moves that you see on America's funniest videos. I pushed myself along. 
We had some small talk about how much I dislike cardio, I am like 175 pounds over weight ok, so running, or ellipticalling, or treadmilling, not on my list of fun things to do. Any skinny girls that are reading this, next time you go to the supermarket, try picking up two, 20 pound bags of potatoes with your anorexic arms and carry them around with you while you shop, its not so easy. That is almost what it feels like to walk in a chubbo's shoes and maybe you won't judge us next time you see us struggling to do something YOU may feel is a meager task..
Sorry again off topic, we talked about moving on to weights, now I much prefer the machines because free weights make your hands stinky and I'm really not into that. I don't care what size you are your hands should never stink like that. She made me do the free weights anyway grrrrrrr. I whined my way through the rest of the workout and was very thankful when it was over. My next appointment is on Friday can't wait! I may just pee my pants I'm so excited. (Again with the sarcasm FYI)
